The Lord continues to teach me about the power of prayer in the my life and in the lives of friends and family. What a blessing to have hurdles overcome, and to be presented with big new questions, like whether or not to expand a family unit in an unconventional way, what service your heart is pulled to, and where you fit into everything.
I have been praying for a lot lately. I have been praying for an ongoing legal struggle my parents finally won, for friends and their transitions into workplaces, married lives, classrooms. I have been overwhelmed by the need for everyday prayer just to get through the daily things in my life here - great fellowship, the desire for fulfillment, pursuit of employment for the next couple of years, and homesickness that lurks around the corner when I just want some lazy days, but feel kind of uncomfortable in my own skin when taking them. What a conundrum.
Last week I started attending a Bible study and coffee group through the Women of the American Church. These women comprise such an individual organization, and I think that meeting people in such dynamic circumstances - different from my own and from where they thought they would be right now, has taught me a lot about expectations.
You see, I have many too many expectations right now. Is it misunderstanding God's will to keep expectations? To pray for the desired outcome in order to realize those aspirations? Should I throw up my arms in defeat at trying to control my own game, as well as in praise? How much am I trying to read too much into what God is trying to show me? A smart friend said something interesting the other week: "Even 'I don't know' is a sign sometimes."
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There's a book called fresh wind, fresh fire.. and it's an incredible book about the power of prayer and about how the holy spirit changed the brooklyn tabernacle church. if you ever have a chance to get your hands on it, i would recommend it. i love you dearly!
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